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December 13, 2003

withdrawal

I am on my second round of estrogen withdrawal. The first time I did not sleep for six monthis. Rather, I woke up, cheery as a robin, at 1 AM, and I was psychotic by 4PM just when I needed to be present and alert.

That time, I tried to withdraw with support from accupuncture. As the sleeplessness continued, I resorted to more bizarre remedies, like cutting up an onion, putting it in a tightly covered jar and inhaling it upon awakening, or rotating my ankles 100 times in each direction. Nothing worked. Nothing but estrogen, which I started again, solving my sleep problem. Then my mammogram showed cysts. I never had cysts. I quit estrogen. FACT DUMP ALERT

The denoument is: this time I am trying Chinese herbs, which I was unwilling to do last time, since I live with a doubter. Cooking Chinese herbs is said to be stinky, nothing you can do quietly like meditation or journaling (the kind of new age activity that doesn't attract the attention of the Doubter). I went to a Chinese doctor who is also a board certified internist for my herbs. I picked him because I thought he would have a better chance of passing Doubter Inspection.

The doctor told me that American medicine addresses physical problems and Chinese medicine addresses metaphysical problems. I am beginning to think I have astrophysical or etherial problems. I am sure there are no board certified internists who treat those. Thank heavens for my ladies group.

My internist/ Chinese doctor combo has been upping the potency of my herbs. Last time he gave me a prescription for Prylosec and Allegra for my weak lung chi and my weak digestive chi. Huh? I put it together about a week later, that the new herb tea might make me sick - but it didn't. This week, I started yet another new tea. I noticed that I was feeling sickish, especially right after a dose. Then, yesterday, I had a nosebleed. I never have nosebleeds. I think it was iatrogenic. I think that's it for Chinese herbs. I didn't take them last night.

Denoument number two: This morning I awoke, robin perky. I was sure that it was 1 AM. I bemoaned the fact that there were absolutely no residual effects to the herbs. "Here I am, back where I started. Thank goodness it's Saturday and I'll be able to nap. " I got up and looked at the clock - 5:45, a full forty five minutes later than I usually get up. I had slept through my alarm. Now I am trying to readjust my internal state to one that believes it is well rested. I don't feel it yet.

Posted by Dakota at December 13, 2003 06:39 AM